Forward-Looking

Patrick, age four, has a ritual involving listening to The Backstreet boys. He walks around and around in a circle. In the beginning when he first started what I thought of as private, he seemed to want to do it alone, but I might have projected that onto him.  He does it less frequently nowadays. Back then his compulsion was a bit frightening to observe because he seemed driven by something unknown, and apparently invisible.

Now that he is far more openly expressive, voluable, energetic, healthy there's nothing to worry about. He's lucky to have an older brother, nine, and a younger one, three. And of course, a mother who adores him.

What will the future be? How forward-looking can one be when so often the past has more allure for private ruminations? This occurred to me as a result of noticing how often my journal entries were backward looking. I wonder what percentage of Blogs (exact same meaning as Journal?) are about this very day, everyday, and even this very hour? Having so far experienced 26,280 days (72x365) habit has set in so I'm not too concerned about getting through this particular day/morning. This day will be a 'snap' as they used to say. It's some tomorrows that are not so easy to plot on the calendar, and to finish untangling the past still looms as an enormous task impossible of completion.

I have a hunch that writing in my journal has some affinity with, some correspondence to, Patrick and his Backstreet Boys dance. Such 'Aborigine' dances are done by firelight by actual Aborigines and called Corroboree. Watching them on film gives me chills. For it's likely we all have a common ancestor.

Barry